Living Well

I’m Just Not Sorry


Today we are going to look at wellness from a different perspective. I’m hoping to challenge us all with some questions and suggestions to benefit our mental and emotional wellbeing. Sometimes it takes sort things out inside of us to make a strong impact in our lives on the outside.

How many times have you said sorry for something you were not actually sorry for? How many times have you used just to preface what you were about to ask or say? More times than you can count? Well I’m just not sorry to say this, you’ve got to stop it right now.

You are a strong and capable woman and you are giving up the power you have in conversations that are in person, over the phone, and in e-mails. I’ve been on a mission to lift other women up AND take back my own power. Ready to join me?

If you’re not sure yet, let me share a little more with you on why you should. You are apologizing for things that are NOT your fault, and accepting blame that is not yours to take. You are putting yourself in the line of fire and anger from other people that shouldn’t be directed at you. You are apologizing to someone who bumped into you in a store or restaurant that caused you to spill what was in your hand. You are not sorry for what you did not do. You are smart, accomplished, and making the most of your days, and decreasing the value of your accomplishments and wit by accepting senseless blame.

Reclaiming Your Power: why you're just not sorry
Let’s turn over a new leaf, and stop apologizing for what we did not do. We can empathize when someone we love is feeling down without apologizing for it. You may be sorry that someone did not have the best experience with your co-worker, but you are not sorry for this co-worker’s failure to do what they should have done. You are sorry for an honest mistake you’ve made and want to correct in the future.

Now that we’re done saying sorry, we have to stop prefacing what we have to say or ask with just. No matter where we are in life or on the corporate ladder, we have a lot to offer those around us. These people may or may not realize how much we have to offer yet, but suddenly it’s diminished by our using of just as qualifier.

  • I just wanted to ask if you have that proposal yet?
  • I just need this back a week a from tomorrow.
  • I just wanted to check and see if you have that thing I asked you about?

These three statement could be much stronger if we only dropped the word just…

  • I wanted to ask if you have that proposal yet?
  • I need this back a week a from tomorrow.
  • I want to check and see if you have that thing I asked you about?

By eliminating the word just from the statements, we are able to more clearly communicate our expectations. We are sure and concise. We show we know what we’re talking about, and expect the other person to hold their end of the bargain.

Ready to join me in being a stronger version of you? If now you know you how, by eliminating two little words from your repertoire, you can empower yourself and communicate more clearly. I want to warn you, it’s a hard habit to break. I hope your belief in yourself will grow and that you will know just how valuable you are to the people who know and work with you!

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7 thoughts on “I’m Just Not Sorry

  1. What a wonderful article! I am guilty of overusing “just” and “sorry” like many others I know. I have tried in the past to cut back on their use, but you are right. It is a hard habit to break. Your post has inspired me to keep on trying until my full confidence shines through. 🙂

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  2. This is so helpful! I really needed to read this today. I’m trying to start my own business, and assertiveness has always been a problem for me. Thank you!

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  3. This is fantastic! I say I’m sorry like 10,000 or more times a day (and that’s only slight exaggeration). Even when I’m in the grocery store I say “Excuse me, sorry!” every time I’m trying to get by someone, even if they are in my way! This is so great, I totally need to just keep trying to say sorry that much. Thank you!

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